Post One

Hello, blog.

Tried starting a blog last year around this time, and was excited to post one posting:). I recently viewed a friend's blog and was totally encouraged to do this. I dont really look at blogs, in fact I feel kind of weird saying and typing the word "blog". Blog Blog Blog. See that doesn't help really.

Truth. I need it. My life needs it. In Person form. The Way the Truth and the Life. I need Him to change me. I need to focus. I need to redeem the time. I pray this can help me, and I pray this can help anyone else who would read it. I need to set parameters for how much I write or I'll look at the clock and realize it's been 3 hours. Cant spend my life doing this. But can certainly be disciplined with a few minutes here and there.

As I type this, I'm up at 1:06am. This has to stop. Solomon - "Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge." Help me Father. Your wisdom Father. HE, Christ, the Son, He is wisdom, and redemption, and sanctification. "Whoever works his land will have plenty of bread, but he who follows worthless pursuits lacks sense." "Greater is he who rules his spirit, than he who takes a city." Wisdom cries aloud in the streets. Wake me up, let me hear this voice. Noone qualifies for simple more than me. Mortar and pestal. To be a man of God. Jesus Christ, my curse of the law, for Your glory and my saving. Oh God I want to please You. Christ. It is CHRIST! The serpent, cursed, elevated, SAVING, exalted as Lord, the Son of God. You became the very worst, Jesus, because You ALONE are good, and You along could love me. You became my wasting of time. You became my lack of desire for You. God I pray this is doctrine of God. You became my judging others. You became my sluggishness. You became my pride. You became my anxiety. You BECAME my lack of trust. My lack of faith. Oh GOD You CRIED OUT to GOD, "WHY??? WHY have You FORSAKEN Me???" You became my ignorance. God You have HATED these, and THAT is why my SAVIOR BECAME them. Jesus my heart cannot give You what You demand, I am completely unable. GOD this is where You want me. Oh God my self-righteousness.

My Redeemer lives. He is eternally able to save me because He lives always to make intercession for me. I am averted to being loved. To things working out. To joy. Jesus please teach me. God my heart. I can feel it physically, clenched. Jesus change me. To be real. To believe in Hell. To have joy. To live with stability. To love. To love. To delight in Christ. My eyes grow tired. You've taught me Lord that I will go thru trials for time if necessary, that the genuinness of my faith, more precious than gold, though refined by fire, may result in the praise of the glory of God. Obedience at this moment is going to sleep. Resting is trusting God. My heart is too dark. Light of the world, shine in my heart. Sun. God know my heart, make me like You. To be changed by glory that is veiled in light.